Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Your New Gravedigger: A Checklist


Drinks (check all that apply)
[ ] Schnapps, Whiskey or other easily sippable and concealable
heartwarming cordial
[ ] Before working
[ ] While working
[ ] Constantly

Smokes
[ ] Top
[ ] Bugle
[ ] Kite
[ ] Things found on ground

Humming (at least two)
[ ] Tuneless
[ ] Vague
[ ] Eerie
[ ] No Top 40
[ ] Droning in and out
[ ] About time, women, or luck, but something that is lost

Hands (check all that apply)
[ ] Gnarled
[ ] Knobby
[ ] Gnarly
[ ] Calloused
[ ] Scratched
[ ] Chapped
[ ] Chaffed
[ ] Dirty
[ ] Bleeding
[ ] Holding Shovel

Ass
[ ] Cold
[ ] Frozen
[ ] Gelid
[ ] Blue
[ ] Surprisingly attractive

Humor
[ ] "morbid" sense of humor
[ ] "morbid" sense of "humor"
[ ] "morbid" "sense of" "humor"
[ ] De'th's no laughin' matter, laddie

Chatter
[ ] Pithy
[ ] Bitchy
[ ] Weather Related
[ ] Scriptual
[ ] Moody Blues Lyrics
[ ] Portentous
[ ] Omenous
[ ] Foreboding
[ ] Talks to dog, owl or shovel
[ ] Salty
[ ] Vengeful
[ ] Hard to follow

Calls dog
[ ] Rufus
[ ] Ol' Spooner
[ ] Beelzebub
[ ] Mother

Character (one or more)
[ ] Bad
[ ] Queere
[ ] Stotic
[ ] Indifferent
[ ] Dry
[ ] Shot
[ ] Morbid
[ ] Moribund
[ ] Clownish
[ ] Diabolical
[ ] All Nerves
[ ] No Nerves
[ ] Salt of the Earth
[ ] Hope to Return to School
[ ] Hope to Avoid Jail
[ ] Sleeping

Wakes Up
[ ] muttering
[ ] screaming
[ ] swinging
[ ] drinking

Taste in Pornography (one or more)
[ ] Empty Juggs Magazine
[ ] Apparently Legal
[ ] More Woman Than Women
[ ] Civil War Historian
[ ] Doll Collector Monthly

Stew
[ ] Irish
[ ] Own juices
[ ] In same thermos as bourbon

Experiences:

Education Level

Schooled by

[ ] Ma
[ ] Pa
[ ] Brother/Sister, later identied as actual parent
[ ] The Streets
[ ] The Road
[ ] The Evil That Men Do


Degree Attained

[ ] Some reform school, released
[ ] Some reform school, burned down
[ ] Merchant Marine, jumped ship
[ ] Some college, neglected to write thesis


War
[ ] Foriegn
[ ] Civil
[ ] Own Personal

Shot a Man in Reno
[ ] To watch him die
[ ] So wife or sweetheart of man could watch man die
[ ] Because needed shooting
[ ] Accidentally
[ ] "Accidentally"
[ ] Felt bad for shooting man's wife

Has dug
[ ] Pet's grave
[ ] Some graves
[ ] Many a grave
[ ] Best friend's grave
[ ] Own grave
[ ] Your grave


Hopes
[ ] None
[ ] To dig more graves
[ ] y'don't mind the mud none
[ ] To get out of the rain


Happy Hallowe'en

TURN #86: WEEK 72; WORDS: 80,0385
NEXT BY 8 NOVEMBER 2006

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

This article is:

* Scrofulicious!
* Rachititastic!
* Scabiriffic!
* Dysenterageous!

Great work!

Anonymous said...

Wonderful.